iPhone Savior

Sports Book Takes A Gamble On Macworld Action

  Special Report by Fay Stoker
Las Vegas sports book John Provenzano or "Johnny Two Soups" as he's known by close friends, has decided to get in on the 2008 Macworld action this year by offering odds on the new Apple products that have become lucrative business from rumors and speculation that add up to capturing eyeballs online. Eyeballs that support big advertising dollars for thousands of websites.

"I see the news on Bloomberg, Gizmodo and The New York Times, I figure there's gotta be some big action on Macworld predictions," said Provenzano, "I'm taking bets on the ultra-portable Macbook, an updated iPhone and even on that iTablet thingy which I think is a long shot. I know there's some greenbacks to be made on this Apple stuff."

Steve Jobs Gets A Face Lift From CNBC Poll

Grabbing a whopping 79% percent of the votes in CNBC's "Face of Business 2007" viewer poll, Steve Jobs emerged the clear winner as the most popular face of innovation and technology atop a huge pile of almost well known faces of business in 2007. Other mugs included "The Google Guys: Larry Page, Sergey Brin and Eric Schmidt" who hauled in 3% and ranked a dismal fourth place, beaten out by The American Homeowner which includes far too many faces to distinguish any one person in the crowd and Citigroup's, Chuck Prince who took second place with 7% because CNBC included a picture of Chuck making a really weird face. No one likes a weird face, so that would also explain the low ranking of Lloyd Blankfein from Goldman Sachs. 

iPhone 1.1.3 Update Photos Surface on Gear Live

Gear Live has posted a gallery of ten iPhone 1.1.3 update photos claiming an advanced sneak peek at the new iPhone features that include:

• Ability to send an SMS message to multiple people
• Google Maps can now display the Hybrid map view
• Google Maps application will pinpoint your location via cell tower triangulation
• Home screen pagination support
• Addiing web bookmarks to your home screen
• Ability to drag and drop application icons on your home screen

Apple Faithful Prepare To Praise Their Savior

One thing that many analysts have overlooked in their predictions for the 2008 Macworld Expo is a rousing standing ovation from the adoring throngs of Apple-philes when Steve Jobs makes his triumphant return to the Macworld stage for his traditional keynote address. An address that provides the inertia for the five day conference and expo. No one is expecting to take pause at the beginning of the event that will suddenly appear more like the close, as the crowd rise to their feet in adoration with many followers displaying tears of joy.

With the overwhelming success of the iPhone both in the U.S. and abroad, many Apple faithful will seize Macworlds opening moments to heap gargantuan adulation on Jobs who has become a god-like persona in their eyes, for thousands since the launch of the iPhone. The Macworld Expo will be the first public opportunity for true Jesus Phone worshipers to heap praise on Jobs in a way that is befitting of their savior. Especially since the iPhone was named both Time Magazine's invention of the year and gadget of the year for 2007. Another significant hallmark worthy of veneration for Jobs is the fact that Apple's stock has more than doubled since last year most recently reaching an all time high of over $200 per share (AAPL), clear confirmation of Jobs' power to raise Apple from the dead.

Were You Naughty or Nice?

Imagine the horror of waking up on Christmas morning to find out what Santa really
hands out when you're naughty. I would rather he left me a lump of coal.The infamous
"iPhone killer" a name coined by Verizon's Chief Marketing Officer Mike Lanman, just
may be killing a whole lot of Christmas dreams for the very naughty this year.

Happy Holidays kids!

Is Fake Steve Jobs Calling It Quits?

A major coup is taking place over at "The Secret Diary of Steve Jobs" with an influential corporate icon possibly sending a huge a shot across the bow of FSJ's battleship. Fake Steve Jobs may be getting a retirement offer he can't refuse. This event would qualify as "The FSJ Effect" in reverse. The story is still developing according to FSJ himself calling the offer to take cash, stack it and pack it, "a complicated situation."

"Bottom line is I've received an overture from the Mothership with a mention of a Think Secret type settlement if I'll stop impersonating Dear Leader on the Web. Nothing nailed down at this point but frankly, honestly, I'm tempted to just take it." Source: FSJ

It's hard to imagine the FSJ blog sleeping with the fishes. It's even harder to imagine a horses head somehow ending up under the covers at the FSJ ranch on Christmas morning, but then it was equally difficult to imagine that the iPhone would drop $200 in price shortly after it's initial launch. Then we hear about Think Secret taking a dive for the short end money. Conclusion? Badda bing! Anything can happen in this online drama that's far from over.

More To The Story (link)   The Saga Continues (link)   Update (link)

The Fake Steve Jobs Effect, Have You Heard of It?

Most of us by now have probably heard of the New York Times effect. When the New York Times runs an article that shines a light on your book or business, Blammo! you gain instant popularity. The same has been true for books driven by the Oprah effect, which in the case of "A Million Little Pieces" backfired and instantly exposed Oprah's Book Club as being lame. Most of us knew that from the start, but it's nice when the entire world agrees in tandem.

I have identified a brand new effect on the global horizon that I've dubbed "The Fake Steve Jobs Effect". It occurs when you have the distinct pleasure of being either toasted or painfully roasted on "The Secret Diary of Steve Jobs" with an active link to your website included in one of FSJ's posts. What happens next is called "The FSJ Effect".

The Great White Hope for iPhone In 2008

    Special Report by Ian Fawing


The highly anticipated white iPhone will prove to be one of Apple's most speculated upgrades for 2008. Not long after the initial launch of the the signature white faced iPod in 2001, demand for color was a rabid request from Appleites. It seemed like forever before iPod got flossed with color which debuted via the iPod Mini in January of 2004. The first black iPod made an appearance on October 26, 2004 when Apple announced the U2 Special Edition model. Now the roles are clearly reversed when it comes to iPhone. Cult of iPhone worshipers are starting to get anxious to have the glow of ol' whitey back. Where's that svelte, funky white boy Stevo?

The New Facebook for Old People

    
(click image to enlarge)                                                  

Now old people can feel like they're back in college with "Pensionbook".
Connect to the latest events, funerals and knitting groups without using
a rotary phone. View grainy photos from back in the day and start living
again, the fancy new-fangled way. It's easy with Pensionbook!

[via Seth Godin and Straightfrommybrain.com]

iPond Fish Tank May Bore Fish To Death

iPond is a tiny fish tank with a speaker built into the bottom for enjoying iPod music while watching a fish being leisurely bored to death. The iPond is causing huge controversy in Australia because of its particularly small size according to the Sydney Morning Herald (link). Pets Paradise is selling Siamese fighting fish with each iPond (view to a kill) aquatic chamber of despair.

"I'm claustrophobic myself, said Callie Beardsley manager of Pets R Pets stores, "I sat sobbing as I stared at my iPond the entire time I listened to Andrea Bocelli singing "Con te partiro". I felt so bad for that little fishy fish, but the tank is too cute."

The biggest concern for animal activists is the quality of music introduced to the fish. "These iPonds have become a fad among teens, an age group notorious for listening to horrible music, said Diane Marx, Director of Aquatic Injustice, "I'm concerned that over exposure to Fergie for example, will result in a slow and painful demise for fish inside an iPond." A keen observation by Marx that applies to more than just fish. 

One store in Sydney has reported selling out of the $70 device while other outlets are reporting brisk sales of the iPond. There is no way to be sure if the iPond is as harmful to fish as experts are making it out to be, but it has certainly agitated a lot of cheerless activists in Sydney, which may ultimately be worth it after all.

Read More   [via Gizmodo and Sydney Morning Herald ]

Original iPhone Wallpapers by Artists Who Hate Cheesy Nature Crap

If you love your iPhone and love customizing it, but hate those cheesy nature wallpapers you see everywhere, then you have much in common with the artists at Poolga.com who like to create their own. It's obvious that these original iPhone and iPodTouch wallpapers are kick ass with just one look. The Poolga.com website is filled with awe inspiring wallpaper designs from simple to extravagant.

These incredibly unique images were created by designers, artists, illustrators and dopey street bums from around the world. They want to share their designs with the rest of us. Now you too can look like you have a real sense of style and artistic flair at those hipster parties where you don't fit in. You can be mister 'ahead of trend' just by uttering "Poolga.com". What did you say? Exactly! I thought you knew.

 

Images above are low res - download directly from Poolga.com (link)

Someone Spiked The Punch at The Zune Social

Special Report by Ian Fawling

SEATTLE, WA - When I peeked in on the Zune social last night over at Zune Scene, I noticed that the party started to take an awkward turn with the first conversation; "Got my third Zune 80 last night- sure enough it had a crooked squircle (actually the metal trim was off), the back button was too recessed and got stuck and the metal piece on the very top was loose." said  Zune Freak, "WTF Microsoft?? My first Zune had a crooked squircle too but the buttons were fine, my second one had a perfect squircle but the left play button was too recessed and got stuck and the metal piece at the top was loose."  It's more like WTF Flextronics?? Flextronics is the same company which makes the Xbox.

According to the Zune jockey's in the forum, things at the social aren't going too well for Zune 80. It looks like the gang over at WIRED may have spoken too soon when they recommended the 80GB "Zune doggy dog" over the hearty iPod Classic. If the rumblings coming from the Zune social are any indicator of quality assurance, a whole lot of people are going to be wired for heartache when they unwrap their Zune 80 come December 25th.

Jackass 2.5, A Blockbuster of Regurgitated Stunts Online

Starting on Dec. 19 through Dec. 31, Blockbuster will be hosting an exclusive online premiere of "Jackass 2.5" for free at blockbuster.jackassworld.com. The film will become available for rent or purchase on DVD December 26 at Blockbuster stores, Blockbuster.com, Amazon and on iTunes.

"It's the first broadband movie ever distributed by a major studio," said Thomas Lesinski, President of Paramount Pictures Digital Entertainment." Source: CNN

The Jackassworld site (link) is currently 'live' with several 'Jackass 2.5' trailers. The site is being hawked by Jonny Knoxville as "just a limp launch" with a hard launch of the website being "fully erect by February 9, 2008." The Jackass 2.5 regurgitation consists of outtakes and unseen footage captured for the 'Jackass Two' feature along with new cast interviews and unbridled chaos according to the site.

"Someone came up with the idea to film all new interviews with the cast, talking about this excess of never-before-seen pranks, stunts, and random acts of behind-the-scenes mischief and stupidity, and package it into a documentary-like feature called jackass 2.5. Although this isn’t necessarily the “new” jackass movie, it’s still every bit as unbelievable, dirty, and downright sexy as its predecessors-maybe even more so at points." Source: Sean Cliver-Jackassworld

The grander scheme here appears to be pointing eyeballs at the official launch of the "Jackassworld" website that will expand it's offerings as it grows into 2008, claiming they will not include user-solicited stunts or pranks. News that's sure to disappoint a surplus of fresh faced You-tubers that have benefited from the Jackass "look at me launch a bottle rocket out of my ass" momentum (watch).   

iPhone Named Number One in Time Magazines Top 10 Gadgets List

Earlier this year Time Magazine named iPhone "Invention of the Year," now the iPhone sits at the number one spot (#1) in Time's Top 10 Gadgets of the year list for 2007. A tremendous achievement for a device that has been on the market for less than six months. If you're sick of of all the rampant iPhone hype, I suggest you burrow under ground for 2008, because the iPhone buzz is about to get even louder with the "the second coming" of iPhone being imminent on the horizon for next year. (2nd gen iPhone news)

"The iPhone changed the way we think about how mobile media devices should look, feel and perform. The design is exceptional inside and out: It's got a slick glass-and-stainless steel case and an elegant touch screen loaded with eye candy." Source: Time Magazine

French Spiderman Apologizes for iPhone 1.1.3 Update Rumor

  Special Report by Doris Flatley

PARIS, FRANCE - French Spiderman issued an informal apology on Wednesday from his apartment in Paris for his role in the iPhone update rumor that spread wildly last week, claiming that he did not deliberately try to mislead anyone with news of an imminent iPhone update 1.1.3. He confirmed that he is deeply remorseful over the entire international incident and insisted that he would devise some way to make proper amends in order to maintain the integrity of his super hero status. The iPhone 1.1.3 update in question, failed to materialize this past Saturday according to the timing promised by the rumor.

"I am so very sorry for my idiot mistake," said Spiderman by phone "My mind is a piece of shit these days, I should have waited for more proof. Einstein has never been wrong, I'm still not sure what happened with him. I was caught up in iPhone hysteria. I admit it, I'm the whore! " 

I surmised that French Spiderman was using a code name when referring to his iPhone informant as 'Einstein'. At the end of our brief conversation Spiderman explained that he would spend quality time with Einstein to gain a better understanding of how their communication broke down. That's when I learned that Einstein is French Spiderman's live in roommate, a large brown bear he rescued from the circus two years ago. Nuff said?

[UPDATE NEWS]   Photo by Cécile (link)   Original Story (link)    

H2O Audio Helps Protect Your iPhone From You

If you're insane enough to wedge your iPhone inside a coat pocket when you go snowboarding or you're prone to self-induced alcohol blackouts, then your iPhone is in need of serious protection. H2O Audio's latest impact protection case is designed to be your active lifestyle "lock it" and "rock it" iPhone babysitter. It can't protect you from your own poor judgment, but it can definitely protect your iPhone.

H2O Audio's latest case design allows for functional control over your iPhone even when you don't have functional control over your small motor skills. The iFR case will not open on impact, weather it's your iPhone that hits the pavement or you perform a face plant while holding your iPhone. Protect your $400 investment against drops, sweat, impact shocks, marring, scratching and your consistent inability to think beyond the age of six.

According to H2O Audio, this is the most ground and pound protection you can get for $39.99. If you're wardrobe does not include pants fashioned out of bubble wrap, then you can continue to walk around clueless with total confidence, knowing that your precious cargo is securely sealed inside a magical sheath of safety. The iFR Ruggedized Armor series case for iPhone is not waterproof or bulletproof, but it will provide ample element protection in rain or snow. H2O Audio also offers a surf series of cases with full waterproof protection for several iPod models. Making your iPhone "you proof" is the best gift idea money can buy. Booyah!

H2O Audio Products [link]    Surf Series Cases [link]    [PRNewswire] 
 

iPhone Superman Plans NYC Apple Store Visit

  Special Report by Fay Stoker
NEW YORK, NY - The new Apple Store on West 14th Street may be the safest place to shop for all things Apple on December 22nd when New York's own iPhone Superman plans to make a special appearance to purchase his very first iPhone according to a statement by the super one himself. He intends to battle crime in NYC by calling in all criminal activity he spies (at the speed of sound) with his trusted new iPhone and his amazing 20/20 vision.

"Having instant access to email and a camera will make me very dangerous to those seedy criminal types who will no longer be able to hide their crimes on the streets," said Supe, "I love New York but I hate to see poor folks be victims of petty thieves. It's time for me to do something, the cops don't move fast enough. That's where I'll come in." I spy with my little eye, a purse snatching guy! Blammo!

Epcot's Spaceship Earth Features Woz Not Jobs

According to some keen side-by-side photo detective work done by Gizmodo it appears that Epcot's Spaceship Earth ride has reopened featuring Woz (Steve Wozniak) rather than Steve Jobs as originally posted in a rumor that surfaced last week via the Distant Creations website. Gizmodo is claiming "that rumor has been smashed and that Epcot loves Woz". (link)

The rumor quickly spread via The Disney Blog, then onto Boing Boing, over to Gizmodo and the rest was history. "What does sitting on the Board of Directors for the Walt Disney Company get you these days? How about a figure of yourself in a famous Disney attraction?" A reference to Steve Jobs from The Disney Blog. 

A Guide to Becoming Steve Jobs

 

I Want To Be like Steve. Now What?" is a practical guide for anyone desiring to emulate the most revered CEO of 2007, Steve Jobs. This DIY manual written by Saree Roll, focuses on helping readers transform themselves into a charismatic personality, make key wardrobe selections and learn to develop inspirational keynote speeches that are guaranteed to captivate even the most cynical audiences.

"My husband is a failed hack software developer that has no original ideas of his own. I wrote this book to inspire him," said author Saree Roll, "He's completely burned out on writing patches for Vista. I wanted him to think different." One more thing... the book goes on sale starting January 15, 2008 at major book sellers.

[Read: "Think of Me and Become More Creative" - Steve Jobs]

Seriously Mood-Up Your iTunes Music

Ready to experience the power of your iTunes library? It might be time to get Moody. Moody appears to be a pretty slick, user-friendly application that works together with iTunes and connects your music by mood. Moody claims that the result will be "the absolute best shuffle mixes you can get." Moody lets you tag your songs by mood according to your own personal tastes. Best part is, it's freeware!

Moods are color coded in a crayon palette from intense, to happy, to melancholy making the color-based tagging process easy to understand. Your tags stay in the files of the songs, and in the iTunes database and are not limited to Moody. You can choose to quick tag multiple tracks or tag tracks as you're listening. This process could be a huge buzz kill for those packing an iTunes library of tremendous girth. Unless of course you just broke up with your longtime girlfriend and find yourself with hours of dead time on your hands while battling a sleep disorder. In that case, the Moody application might prove to be your new best friend. Hi I'm a Moody!  

Watch Moody Quick-Tour Video (link)    [via Lifehacker]