For those of you who've been sleep navigating the interwebs lately, you may not have noticed that Fake Steve Jobs has reclaimed his blogging throne and he's back with a vengeance. His latest skewering is trademark brilliance entitled, "Jon Rubinstein now says he'll get a new liver, too". The great fake one mercilessly lampoons Palm's CEO in classic Jobsian style while reducing the Pre device to a polished turd.
"Jon Rubinstein, is planning to receive a liver transplant. No official date -- they just say it will happen sometime in the next 12 to 18 months. Palm says Rubinstein's liver will have features that my liver lacks, though they won't say what those features are." The Secret Diary of Steve Jobs
El Jobso goes on to congratulate Rubinstein's team of ex-Apple traitors with a huge bat as he freely serves up laugh outloud, backhanded compliments about the Pre like breath mints at Gilroy's annual garlic festival. Lavishing on the device the kind of copy-cat praise it truly deserves.
"Really, guys, it's a terrific piece of work. Especially that keyboard with the teeny-tiny keys. I was thinking of an accessory you could sell in the Sprint stores: a little knife that Pre users can use to whittle down their fingertips." The Secret Diary of Steve Jobs
Because I'm certain Dan Lyons will spare no proper tongue lashing in order to remain user-friendly in front of his Noobweek overlords, I'm as giddy as a school girl now that he's finally back at the helm. Dan Lyons is a gifted satirist and a pop phenom that should avoid trying to strangle his Steve Jobs persona, but embrace it through to its natural conclusion. He is "the one" the oracle spoke of. It's his destiny! There I said it.
After all, the tech universe has become painfully out of balance without Fake Steve Jobs around to whip the useless rabble of power-nerds into humility with his razor sharp tongue of nine tails. Welcome back Danny boy, it's been way too long broseph.
Now... who would like a big serving of roasted Rubinstein?
[image courtesy of FSJ Blog]
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