It's time for the outdated, obsolete pencil to move over and make room for the newly designed Apple Pencil — a completely familiar but wildly different writing tool for just $99 dollars.
The Pencil by Apple — was unveiled by CEO Tim Cook during a press event Wednesday at San Francisco's Bill Graham Civic Auditorium. The crowd in attendance was made up of mostly overfed bloggers and pasty-faced journalists who were ready to cheer for anything Apple presented, no matter if it was an overpriced Pencil, iSkillet or a simple bottle of revolutionary iWater used to help them swallow the hype.
"You may never have seen Apple Pencil before, but you already know how to use it. From the first moment, it does what you expect." the company wrote on their website.
If I spend over $100 dollars after tax — I would expect my iPencil to draw me up an entire gourmet dinner— although most who attended the event were just hoping to stay awake long enough to sample Apple's Pencil for a few sweaty minutes worth of scribbling, sketching, annotating, and editing on an oversized iPad after the show.
A full charge on the Apple Pencil will get you 12 hours of creative freedom that is unmatched in the world of traditional pencils. Just don't call this cool thingy a stylus — because it's a pencil bro.
Innovative street artist Elam Nikserof understands the real power of the revolutionary Apple Pencil that "feels like a true writing instrument" without requiring all the wood, sharpening or even an eraser.
"After experiencing the over-the-top design and marketing that Apple did for this product, I'm convinced my creative abilities are going to grow beyond what I can even imagine right now," said Nikserof. "I can best define my work today as sloppy stencil stuff that's not well thought out at all, but Apple's pencil will change all that by delivering an extraordinary new level of precision — without any delivery charges.
The overtly sexy iPencil video, narrated by Apple's Chief design Officer Jony Ive, does a stellar job of creating authentic demand for owning Apple's Pencil even if you're unable to actually afford the $799 price tag of an iPad Pro device which was uniquely designed to use with their new Pencil.
"I just want to hold that slender tool in my hand for 12 hours straight and stroke it ever so gently," said Elam Nikserof about the Apple Pencil. "It's captivating to see a thing of such beauty — I can't wait to charge it up for the first time and then put in a perfectly lit display case until I can afford to buy an iPad Pro."
Apple's iPad Pro is expected to ship in November. But if I know Apple, they'll most likely launch the Pencil at the same time to ensure that the future of writing, scribbling and sketching goes forward for future generations to come. We'll soon see how right I am.
And much like that mail order bride you had shipped in from the Ukraine — the Apple Pencil is eerily designed to act the same way, "You hold it, but it doesn’t hold you back."