TORONTO, CANADA - Cult of iPhone faithful in Toronto braved soggy weather with crowds camping out for over 16 hours in damp socks to gain access to Apple's iPhone 3G, currently the hottest cell phone on planet earth. The Ruined iPhone controversy did not detour thousands of pub loving Canadians from lining up like grade schoolers to be the first to extend a wealthy handshake to Rogers. Each one willing to sign up for a three year prison sentence by agreeing to pay excessive monthly data and service rates in exchange for that guaranteed cool factor only iPhone can offer. For this kind of blind obsession, Rogers was happy to roll out the red carpet.
Lines outside Rogers locations started growing exponentially on July 10th when many couch surfers in Canada quickly realized over 60,000 pissed off statesmen were not coming to the big party on July 11th. The Ruined iPhone protest and petition paved the way for thousands of launch day slackers to cease the day. An idea that most casual sluggards would never dream of. The well publicized petition forced Rogers to choke up a $30 promotional 6GB data plan like someone was applying the Heimlich maneuver. The result was a timely windfall for hordes of apathetic Canadians favoring a peaceful surrender of their hard earned cash.
A man appropriately named Steve, (pictured at left) celebrated being the 117th regular guy in Canada to own iPhone 3G as he left the Rogers Plus store in Montreal with his prized millstone held high. A lifetime achievement that reminds us all that a brain is a terrible thing to waste. Repeat after me... Steve is cool!
According to a report by Reuters, Rogers says that they sold out of stock in most cities, and that the iPhone 3G launch was the "best weekend of handset sales in Rogers' history." What Rogers didn't say was; Screw those backwards-ass protest monkeys who lost the fight! We eat angry pieces of crap like them for breakfast. A clever reference to the breakfast of champions.
Most large corporations with a stranglehold monopoly on telecom services prefer customers who are mindless zombies inclined to comply in an orderly manner. The launch of iPhone 3G in Canada did not disappoint the wireless giant in the slightest, from Calgary to Montreal. In fact, the majority of Canadian consumers exceeded Rogers' wildest expectations. Rogers thanked the hordes of iPhone faithful with shiny red helium balloons and two years, eleven months and twenty six days of over priced slavery. A fitting end to a year of longing. Some days it's good to be king.
[via Ars Technica via Reuters] [Montreal Launch Photos by Anirudh Koul]
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